I always recommend a slow integration to a new or unfamiliar childcare situation. I would first ask the parent to bring their child with them and stay for the entire visit.
Allowing the child to feel comfortable and safe is the key here. The next time, you could try a different time of the day. For example, if you visited at 10 am until 12, then come the next time from 2 to 4pm. This way, your child will be able to see different parts of his or her new day. The next visit, the parent may feel confident enough to try (leaving for a small amount of time). Even a 1/2 hour will give your child enough time to realize you are not there, but (very)soon later to be reconnected with you. A few attempts at this, and things should start to go smoothly.
Being A calm, confident happy Mom is the BEST way for your child to see that their new childcare provider is safe, and that Mommy has NO problem leaving (you) with them.
Toddlers/babies are amazing at reading our body language they can sense when we are uneasy or unsure, and a weary mother will definitely create a weary child. Make your drop offs quick, happy, and routine! Your child will have a better send off to their day if you do this!
Also, talking about daycare when you are at home will help your child get used to her new ‘world’. Perhaps purchase a special lunch bag, or inside shoes for his or her new daycare. Keep everything as upbeat and positive as you can. Placing a family photo in his or her backpack may also help for those times when your child misses you, or is feeling sad.
Question: How do you deal with a child who is hitting or scratching other children?
If your child is continuously hitting another child (or you) it all comes down to proper wording from the parent (caregiver).
“It’s NOT okay for you to hurt Jesse’s body!
“Can you see that he is sad, and that he is crying?”
“You need to ask him if he is okay. Can you think of a way to help him right now?”
Asking a child to apologize for something they are not sorry for is useless. Making them acknowledge their actions is helpful; this is a great start to teaching empathy!
Ask the child (who hit) to help you get a cold cloth or some ice.
Ask the child who hit to stay with you and the hurt child until (the hurt child) feels ready to play again.
Remember as an (adult) that hitting comes from fear so the child who hit is figuring things out in their head, and they are not always capable of making the right decisions all the time.
Keeping clam and avoiding using words like “bad” or “naughty” is key. Try to remember it’s their actions we are not okay with (the hitting or scratching) not “them” as a person.